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Whether someone emails us an “Ask the DUO” question on our website, during a client interview or interacting with great folks we meet on our book tour, one question that’s regularly posed to us is, “If I’m starting over again, when is it a good time to introduce my children to someone I’m dating, and what’s the best way?” There is no set answer to this question, but here are eight things we suggest that you consider to help you arrive at the right time for you and your children.Make sure you’ve had solid, futuristic conversations!Since the goal is not to introduce your children to every man you date along the way while searching for your Prince Charming, it’s important that you have had time to clearly discuss with your man that although you’re not married, you both have intentions of giving a long-term, exclusive, committed relationship with each other a chance.In actuality, many childless singles find single moms very attractive as they can, in a lot of ways, be more mature and independent than a young, developing woman. If he is a guy that has never dated a single mom before, chances are he is going to hit a serious learning curve early on in the relationship.While this isn’t always the case and children don’t always change women for the better, many women grow in maturity exponentially from the moment that baby enters their life. Let the relationship organically grow and see how deep it gets before you introduce the kids and bring them into your relationship. He will need time to think about what it means to him and the new responsibilities that will come his way. Eventually this will all mesh together and he will forget what it’s like to not have kids in his life, but in the beginning stages, it’s important that you meet him at his level at times. It’s important that he sees that you are a strong role model for your kids, but slowly introduce that concept to him.Or invite him to an outdoor barbecue with plenty of family and friends.

You must know what to expect and whether it is something you want and can deal with.

Take honest stock of your needs and find out what you want in a relationship.

According to Christie Hartman in “Dating the Divorced Man: Sort Through the Baggage to Decide If He's Right for You,” there is a great possibility of ignoring your needs to fit into your man’s life rather than add to his burdens, which could lead to unhappiness later on.

Help him, guide him and create an environment for him where he has a chance to find his own parenting skills.

Giving him tips is okay, but don’t tell him what to do.




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